A Conversation about the 10 Issues Man Say Matter Most
Patrick Morley
Patrick Morley is most famous for his book Man in the Mirror and writes mostly for Christian men and men in general. I was interested to read this book because I found out about it from one of the men’s groups studying through these issues in my church.
He begins the book with a prelude about a zoo-raised lion and a wild line. He says some Christian men feel like the wild line in a cage. They need resources to fulfill their God-given masculinity and do what Jesus expects of them. He presents what will and will not discussed in this book.
The first issue he raises is identity: settling who I am and what my life is about. He shares three things every man needs. I think he is right about these three essentials for men. He postulates that when you understand your identity in Christ everything else falls into place. He describes what the Bible says about our identity and how it changes in Christ. There’s a big difference between how we see our identity and how these us. This is a most helpful and foundational chapter for the whole book.
Several chapters are devoted to working out how identity affects our life. The second issue men face is life beginning with life balance: how to be faithful with everything entrusted to me. Our lives get out of whack and overrun with so many things. Related to identity are our priorities (and five biblical priorities for every man), the following chapters further outline different priorities he has mentioned in this chapter.
Next, he discusses the third issue may need help with, which is growth: becoming a Kingdom-minded man. He focuses on spiritual growth. He describes the different things men need in their lives regularly to grow in Christ. Some of these include spiritual disciplines, the Bible, a quiet time, prayer, small groups, serving others,
The fourth issue discussed in Morley’s book is marriage. He gives wisdom on how to handle your marriage. This chapter did not appeal to me as much only because I am single. The fifth issue men need help with is children. While I am the child of my parents, I found this chapter very interesting. I don’t have children, but as a pastor I disciple spiritual children. He addresses the father-son relationship. He shares tips and guidelines to help you become a better parent.
The sixth issue men deal with is friendship. It’s hard to find and keep godly friends. He talks about the importance of having godly friends, that God designed us to need friends and to be friends. Friends make us better. He tells you how to develop your friendships. Another issue important to men is the topic of work. We should think our work is important
My favorite parts of the book are the call to action and the reflection questions at the end of the chapter. These were challenging, left me wanting to do more about my spiritual, and help others grow. Each chapter ends with a prayer you can pray, or start your prayers. We should think our work is important thing that we contribute to society. But what else does the Bible teach us about our work? The author goes through how we should think about our work.
The eighth issue the author deals with had on is the lust. This may be the most difficult temptation for men. Morley addresses this pivotal topic and what men can do about it. We must know what it really is before we can conquer it. Marriage cannot be the only answer for every man. It is one biblical way to handle lust. His clarifications on lust are very helpful “handlebars” for men. He addresses issues such as masturbation, the second book, and the strategy of fleeing. He offers solutions that will help you get free of it. This was the most helpful chapter of the whole book.
The ninth issue for men Morley presents and deals with is a man’s role in culture. We are bombarded with issues that require more than logic and intellect to deal with. Men need to know how they can address these issues in the Christian and hopeful way. God leaves us in the world so we can be lights to it. He addresses racial injustice as an example of an approach that Christian men can take with any cultural issue. He gives Daniel, Joseph, and Mordechai as examples of someone who had to represent God in culture. When Christian men get involved in culture, Jesus can propel in the darkness.
The final issue that men need guidance with in this world is sharing your faith: how to have authentic spiritual conversations with your friends. He says that evangelism is a ministry of reconciliation. He discusses relative truth and what really moves the needle. Our message doesn’t change but our methods need to so we can address our culture. He gives pointers on how to start spiritual conversations. He also gives a process to share your faith with others.
He concludes the book with an afterword with each chapter’s call to action. He challenges every man to read the book and share it with a group of men or even just with a partner. I think Morley does a great job of covering these ten issues men face. I personally found most of the chapters very helpful.
I recommend this book for every Christian man to ask questions about these areas of life. Morley has made a ministry and lifetime out of helping men with these issues and many more. You cannot go wrong by reading this book and getting clarification and actionable help on how to address these issues in your life.
